« Dear Robbie...

My Girlfriend is already planning our wedding...and we're not even ENGAGED YET!

by Robbie Owens

"Dear Robbie,

My girlfriend and I have been together for a year, and we're not engaged. But I went on her Pinterest page the other day and saw something a little weird and alot alarming...she had an entire category about wedding stuff! Everything was on it: the dress she wants...the venue...what kind of flowers...the whole nine yards!

Should I be freaked out as much as I am? Is she already thinking about marrying me even though we haven't been together for that long? Bro...HELP ME!"

John from Sioux Falls

John,

My first instinct was to tell you to RUN as fast as you can to a remote village in Alaska and become a fisherman! But, after realizing how much it would cost to escape to Alaska, I settled down. There's two ways to look at this...

ONE: women are ALWAYS looking to plan their wedding! It doesn't matter how old they are (they probably start when they're little girls) or how long they're dating a particular fella. If it's been a certain amount of time, they're gonna go "balls to the wall" BRIDEZILLA and start looking at crap that will freak you out, just like you are right now!

TWO: Listen to me very carefully...social media is NOT real life! GASP! I know. This may come as a shock to you and everybody else on the planet. But it's true. Facebook...Twitter...Instagram...Pinterest are for entertainment purposes. You finding this on her Pinterest account is not a surprise. If she saw something that she liked, she "pinned" it for later. That later could be a few years down the line with you, or ten years down the line with somebody else. Take it with a grain of salt.

Keep in mind that women are pre-programmed to find their alleged "soul mate" as soon as humanly possible and get married ASAP and push out babies and create this soap opera-esque perfect life for themselves. If it freaks you out, stop looking at her Pinterest. BUT...if she rolls into your house/apartment/cardboard box and plops magazines like "Today's Bridezilla," "Crazy Brides Quarterly" and "Psycho Wife Digest" let me know and I'll chip in on that one way ticket to Anchorage, okay?

Good luck! I'll be praying for you!

Robbie Owens

PS...food for thought...watch this...just in case!